I wondered...

...how long it would be before someone made a movie about this hysteria.

One step closer...

...to Idiocracy?

The Best New Releases of '08...

...which you might not have heard of. In no particular order.

I'll open with Флёр's latest, Эйфория ("Euphoria"), though unlike the bands to follow, I have no MySpace link for this fabulous pair of Ukrainians. Usually classified, when classified, as "ethereal wave", the new disc takes something of a departure from that, incorporating harsher and more aggressive themes and music while maintaining the vocal and melodic forms distinctive of Флёр. Check out "Новое матное слово" ("New foul word").

Though the frequently daft nuts at Wikipedia list this album's release as '07, the artist's official site and my copy of the disc itself both say 2008, so it's going here: Anna Maria Jopek, Id (Amazon). This Polish artist's latest release has taken on an international flavor, a new direction for her work heretofore, with contributions from the Brazilian Oscar Castro Neves to Norwegian pianist Tord Gustavsen, Branford Marsalis' saxophone work to Richard Bona's bass, to Mino Cinelu's percussive talents and Dhafer Youssef's singing and oud, etc., etc., etc. Quite a mix, and I think it works quite well for her. The new direction and the particular combination of styles—often in the space of a single song—surprised me the first time I heard this disc, and I'm jaded enough at this point to make that surprise factor one of the key requirements for putting an album on this list. One of the standout tracks for me: "To, Co Nienazwane", "What goes unnamed":

Tyle było chwil dla których nie znalazłam odpowiednich słów. A przecież to, co nienazwane – gubi się. To, czego język nie ocali – traci sens. Bezdomne, bezpowrotne, zmierza wprost do nieistnienia. Zwinny mój język jest posłuszny mi. Pieści Cię słowem, stwarza Ciebie i ocala Cię.

Jakich trzeba słów, abym opisać mogła oczu twoich żar? Jak przetłumaczyć pojedyncze drżenie warg tak, aby rysy twe nie pozostały już tylko moim wspomnieniem. A więc czymś zupełnie innym...

Roughly,

There are so many moments in my life for which I haven't the right words. Yet what goes unnamed fades from memory. What you can't capture in language loses its meaning, becomes lost, irrevocably; heads for oblivion. So let my tongue obey me; caress you with words; frame you in them and save you.

What are the words that can describe the passion of this look in your eyes? How can I capture this fleeting tremor of your lip, just so, that it remain for me a living thing, not just a fading memory or something else entirely...

Arkan, Hilal (Amazon: CD or MP3). This is a fantastic debut from this Tunisian group, incorporating traditional Middle Eastern instruments and vocals into modern metal forms. Representative tracks: "Defying the Idols"; instrumental, "Amaloun Jadid".

Haale, No Ceiling (Amazon: CD or MP3). This Persian New Yorker offers up an interesting mix on her debut, lyrics switching between English and Farsi, the latter usually with a Sufic theme, and music ranging from Middle Eastern influence to American psychedelica. Example of the mixed styles: "Ay dar Shekasteh".

Ad Ombra, Rites of Genesis (Equinox Tremendum). And I don't say this just as a return pat on the back for Stanciulescu's earlier complimenting of my own work; I think this is a genuinely good album. There are a few places where I'd like to hear the work performed on the physical, traditional instruments as the synths occasionally fail to do the music itself justice but overall I'd still recommend this to anyone interested in so-called "dark" ambient orchestrations. Suggested sample track: "Heart Sermons".

Dark Dark Dark, The Snow Magic (Amazon: CD or MP3). My first and most immediate impression is to think The Decemberists' and DeVotchKa's love child. From the energy of these tracks and the band's performance, I can't help but feel that perhaps they would be best experienced live, but be that as it may I have quite enjoyed this disc on its own merits. Hopefully I'll have a chance to see them live at some point to see if my feeling's accurate. Go and listen to the "Ferment in D minor".

Punch Brothers, Punch (Amazon). This may surprise some, as this and the primary instigator, Chris Thile, tends to be more "country" than my typical interests incline me, but this is a brilliant album and I love the direction it's taking. Thile has assembled a crew of talented improv players on traditionally country and bluegrass instruments and has orchestrated them after the fashion of more traditional string quartets and quintets, smashing two previously disparate musical traditions into a singular fusion, then sprinkled a generous dusting of spice from modern compositional forms and theories such as atonalism, discordance and such. (Though the disc has a few other tracks, these comments refer primarily to the core of the album, tracks 2 through 5, "The Blind Leaving the Blind" in four movements.)

Jóhann Jóhannsson, Fordlândia (Amazon: CD or MP3). This is a brilliant disc. It's a concept album, so, naturally, much more could be said of it, much analysis made, but it's all unnecessary; my first sentence suffices. Go, buy this and enjoy. I don't dislike any of these tracks, so picking a standout is difficult, but if I must, I would say "The Rocket Builder (Io Pan!)".

Scar Symmetry, Holographic Universe (Amazon: CD or MP3). An excellent representative of modern technical metal, and a well put-together theme album. A little more of the growly vocal than I tend to prefer, but all the other elements, I think, make up for it. On a down note, as there's a change of vocalists for this group after this album, we might not be able to expect more of the same in the future. Representative, for the mix of styles, rhythms, vocals: "Prism and Gate".

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Honorable mentions:

Eleanoora Rosenholm, Älä Kysy Kuolleilta, He Sanoivat (Amazon). Though I must confess I am perhaps still more partial to her last disc, this sophmore release is more than worth having a listen to. Try, "Vladimir Grutšov".

Arborea, Arborea (Amazon). Not at the top of the list, but a charming first offering none the less. Listen to "Red Bird".

Balmorhea, Rivers Arms (Amazon). There are truly some great moments and works on this album, and I would recommend giving it a listen. It only falls short of the top list, above, by virtue of some of the fourteen tracks being a bit too similar or repetitive to my ear. It's a good album, but perhaps could have used a little more editing/pruning.

Strangers Die Every Day, Aperture for Departure. Again, many nice moments on this album, but on the whole the tracks are either too long or too repetitive for the material they're working with. There are several tracks here where you can randomly move the slider back and forth to other parts of the track and not sound like you've changed the music much if at all. They do sound like skilled players, so I hope we can expect more and better from them in the future, but they really need to work on developing their material—as unfortunately, for this album, development means more than repeating the same melodic material for several minutes while occasionally adding or removing percussion or haphazard pizzicato plucking of strings.

Vampire Weekend, Vampire Weekend (Amazon). It seems there's some kind of magic to this album that I have so far been unable to find. "Oxford Comma" caught my attention when it was circling through some of the science blogs, and I gave it a few listens at the time, and though it was a little disappointing to discover that the song, to quote the singer, was "more about not giving a fuck than an oxford comma", it was oddly catchy—before it was played to death by every blog and station—so on its basis I bought the disc. If everyone's permitted a mistake once in a while, this was one of mine. I still see praise for these guys and this disc everywhere, so apparently, as above, it has a magic that has eluded me. The honorable mention is for that elusive magic that has captured the hearts of so many; the reason it doesn't show up above in my actual list is that I have not been so enchanted: me, I would have been disappointed in this music if it were being done by a high school band. That it's a professional release with innumerable fans simply boggles the mind.

Das war... seltsam.

Before stumbling across page 115 of the German edition of the Lonely Planet travelling phrase book series today, I hadn't realized just how "lonely" the target audience apparently was. Suddenly, the title of these travel guides has taken on a very different meaning.

Wondering if all their books are like this, I took a tour through those of them that I could locate in Google Book Search, and it does look as if such a section appears in many of their titles.

Their Latin American Spanish Phrasebook has a section devoted to "el sexo" ("¡Vamos a la cama! ¡Así cariño, así!"). The Amharic (Ethiopian) phrasebook has a "romance" and "dating" section that seems largely limited to "Can I take you home?" (በት ላደርሰህ?) and "Let's use a condom!" (ኮንዶም አነጠቀም). The Greek Phrasebook is a bit more extensive on the same topic, including the apparently "charming" lines "Μ' αρεσει το στηθος σου / Μ' αρεσει ο κωλος σου... Do those actually work? The Portuguese Phrase Book moves from teaching "o sexo anal" to "Porque é que não te mudas para o meu apartamento?" ("Wanna move in?") in just a couple lines of text. While it doesn't seem to spend as much time on sex as the other titles, their phrase book for Costa Rican Spanish has a curious passage that introduces "¡Hijo de puta!", "¡No me jodas!", "¡Maldita sea!", "¡Mierda!", "¡Vete a la mierda!" and "¡Me cago en dios!" (!) followed by... "¡Que bruto!"—No shit, right?

The Vietnamese Phrasebook doesn't seem to have a chance to introduce a sex/romance section due to the pages expended on teaching you how to ask the location of the methodone clinic and how to enroll! (Seriously, on page 105 in "Social Issues", the same page that teaches you how to swear in the language.)

Strange. Suppose I'll have to keep an eye out for the rest of these; I've read a lot of travel guides over the years, but the LP series is, I think, the first I've encountered that offers sections on scoring drugs or one night stands in foreign lands.

Kids these days...

Were I to show you the photos of a handful of kids, could you tell anything about them from their pictures? Let's try an experiment. What impression do you get of these kids?

What kind of people do you think they are?No, really. Think about it a minute. Look at them, consider them. What impression do you get?Nerds? Geeks? Preps? Jocks? Goths? Good kids? Bad kids? What do their faces say to you? Their poses? Their expressions?(Scroll down... Nota bene, if you've a particularly weak stomach, you might want to reconsider reading more.)

Do they say "murderers"? Do they shout "cannibals"?Do those faces tell you that four of those kids killed, butchered and ate the other four after bathing in their blood?Because that's what they've done.You're looking at four, of eight, "Satanic" murderers recently arrested in the Yaroslav region of Russia, and their four victims. Though "victim" is perhaps a misleading term in this context. Clearly they're victims in the technical sense, being murdered by the others, yet all evidence so far points to the four as would-be members of the cult formed by their eight assailants. But let's back up a bit, first.Specifically, let's go back to July 2006. Voronov (bottom row, rightmost column in the above)—going by a variety of names in their group, from "Raven" to "Hitler" to "Ethiopia"—confessed that they had been out walking and drinking in a cemetery at that time when Ogolobyak (second from left, bottom row) suggested they dig up a fresh grave. Chistyakov (not pictured) found a shovel and they began digging by turns until they reached the coffin, which they broke open and pulled out the corpse of a young girl. Ogolobyak cut open her chest with a knife and removed the heart, which the group later ate. He commanded Makovkin (second from left, top row; known as "Doctor Got") to dismember the body, which they later disposed of in the forest near the cemetery grounds. The body was later discovered by authorities, or at least the headless and limbless torso, minus heart and breasts; as the fresh grave had been restored, the body was not connected to it and remained an open, unidentified murder until the recent arrests.They seem to have repeated the act a year later. They became more frequently active on Walpurgis night this year, the eve of May 1st, when they gathered and crucified a cat in a wooded lot not far from Ogolobyak's home—or, rather, his parents' home.In June they began carrying out raids on local cemeteries, esp. the Leontevskoe, one of the oldest in a city itself a millennium or more in age. According to a representative of the churchyard, the attacks happened at least once a week—monuments destroyed, crosses ripped from the ground and broken, hundreds of them not even counting the mere wooden items, and bodies and graves desecrated.During this time they were also actively proselytizing. Baranov (not pictured; "Klyk") was appointed as "information gatherer" for the group—drawing their information from (where else?) the internet, with sources that leave no wonder their teachers gave the opinion that all had been of "below-average intelligence". One document, for instance, that they distributed, which was also found in the possession of one of the victims at her home (Pukhova, leftmost, bottom row), is called "101 Rules of being a Satanist" and can be read at its original home at http://nskpunk.ru/articles/33—if you read Russian. It is a ridiculously stupid and even immature document, which imagines "Satanism" is about buying/wearing "black jeans, black T-shirt and black Cossacks, with a goat-head pentagram on the shirt", about having "long black hair" (wear a wig until it grows out!, no, really, Rule 17, and by Rule 18, dye your hair if it's the wrong color, only black—like Satan!—will do; by Rule 19, blonde may be beautiful but it just isn't "bleak enough" to be Satanic; by Rule 21, you may not shave your head, only hair that is "long, black and greasy" will make you "look bleak and awful"), and many another stupid thing. Rule 23, for instance, explains that you have to have the pentagram on your shirt so that you won't "be confused with a fag"... No, I'm serious. That's what it says. "что бы тебя не путали с пидором, тебе нужна пентограмма." (You avoid the awful fate of being confused with, instead, a "biker", by the simple fact that you don't have a bike. Lovely reasoning, no?) Rules 24-28 are also "clever"... "24: The pentagram—this is just an inverted star in a circle, standing on it's neck. But you don't need to know this, just remember the word. 25. The pentagram is your mentor: it comes directly from Satan and sanctifies the blood of innocent virgins. 26. Or you can buy it in shops that sell souvenirs to the Pinks. 27. The pentagram, your most important weapon in the fight against enemies! 28. It can also be used to open beer bottles. (Еще ею можно открывать бутылки с пивом.)" Jumping: "44. The most advanced form of Satanist is the Satanic-magician. 45. In order to become one, it's necessary to read many books that you can find in the bookstore on the shelves for 'magic,' 'esoterica' and 'fantasy'. The best books are those of Papus, Crowley, Castaneda and Nick Perumov. You need to remember or write down all the strange and incomprehensible words you find in those books!" (Not actually learn anything, note, just be able to jabber words you don't understand; gibberish is good enough, right?) Because, remember Rule 48, the "Satanic-magician must constantly use as many of these words and expressions as he can remember in conversations, or no one will know he works. 49. He should choose at least one of the words, like 'voodoo' or 'tantra' or something, and say 'I practice ...', as this makes it sound like he does something. 50. But be sure you figure out what that word means first, so you don't say something stupid like 'I practice egregore', which won't work." I like 51, too, where you see that when two "Satanic-mages" are gathered together, they try to one-up one another as to who knows more of these sorts of terms and expressions, for knowing the words equates to the amount of "work" you can do. Points 52-54 finish out the grade of "Satanic-magician" by observing: "52. There are different techniques for success in this. For example, you could say that the subject is too complex to explain, or that doing so to the uninitiated might kill them, it's so grim and terrible. It's better to say this when talking to the uninitiated however, not to other Satanic-magicians, as they too know how to lie. 53. The most common way is to say that your knowledge came from a very rare book in a private collection. When choosing  a title, the more unintelligible the better, and ideally two hyphenated words, like 'Azag-tot' and adding the words 'black book'. It will come out dark and terrible: 'the Black Book of Azag-Tot'! It sounds powerful. 54. No! Not the 'Black Book of Arda'! That won't work. And never say that you're an elf, dwarf, vampire, asur, etc. It just won't work." Sage advice. The next class is the "Satanic-philosopher" who is basically the same as the preceding only he tries to remember the names of philosophers rather than barbarous names from fantasy and occult books he's shoplifted. But, as Rule 56 tells us, this is "easy, because they are funny names, like Plato or Shtirner". Rule 57 assures us of the necessity of decrying one or another of these authors from time to time in conversation by saying things like "x was, of course, a genius, but he was wrong!", for in that way "everyone will think you are smarter than x and respect you". That's all there is to it. But remember, "58. The most difficult Satanic philosopher is Nietzsche, and you definitely have to bring him up; otherwise people might think you haven't read Nietzsche, and that won't work at all!" But I'm not going to translate the whole damned thing; it gets worse, but this is already far afield of what I sat down to write about, so let's get back to our point, and take the above as illustrative of how these people think. And realize that while parts of that read almost like satire, they took it in dreadful earnest. This is the mentality.And this is the crop of that sowing.In June, four kids disappeared: Olga Pukhova (leftmost, bottom row), 16 y/o; Barbara Kuzmina (second from right, top row), 16 y/o; Andrei Sorokin (rightmost, top row), 16 y/o, b/f of Kuzmina; and Anna Gorokhova (second from left, bottom row), 17 y/o. A large scale search was carried out for two months, directed by the regional governor himself, Sergei Vahrukov.On August 12, the remains of four dismembered and disembowelled corpses were discovered on a vacant lot in Yaroslav, barely 250 meters from where Ogolobyak lived. They brought them out of the ground piece by piece: hands, head and feet—then the butchered torsos, with the hearts removed, the breasts and genitals cut off. Their heads had been scalped. Dyed-red hair littered the ground above the mass grave. Nearby were the remains of the still hanging, maggot-riddled cat, as well as, a bit farther to another side, a dog's corpse with slit throat, and another, odd, cross, with a scythe propped alongside.Later the same day four suspects were taken into custody, and within a week, four more, seven boys and a girl, from 17 to 19. The slaughter transpired over the course of two nights, apparently on or near the summer solstice in latter June. They were called to Ogolobyak's house in pairs, under the pretense of initiation, drank till intoxication and then were lured out into the wooded path where they were killed by being stabbed each a full 666 times, while Baranov read a prayer, and his girlfriend, Xenia Kuznetsova (leftmost, top row; "Kara") was baptized in the font of blood spewing fresh from the victims. The murders were apparently to effect her initiation.After death, the corpses were mutilated, and a bonfire kindled at a nearby tree over which were cooked, and later eaten, various parts of the slain's anatomy.The evidence and confessions seem overwhelming, yet at least one of the investigators is saying he does not feel these idiot kids pulled this off alone and believes the "mastermind" is still at large. His logic, however, is somewhat lacking. His basic argument seems to be that these kids can't be "true Satanists" because they didn't follow proper procedures and rules for sacrificial offerings and so forth—one wonders how this member of the mayor's office himself is aware of such technical issues of sacrificial offerings to Satan—declaring that they must be "illiterate, homebrew Satanists, not initiates" (неграмотными доморощенными сатанистами, а не инициированными). Far be it for me to question an "expert", but he seems to be missing the point: the kids' own confessions describe how they half-assed all this b.s. from things they found on the 'net; their teachers said they were idiots—their actions confirm it. Only this guy is imagining some larger, organized cult at large of which they're a part. He needs to actually read the stupidity of those 101 rules rather than just observing they were being passed around. Experts—harrumph! : /But he may have some reason to suspect others. Medical examiners note that the dismembered bodies are meticulously butchered, with skill as if experienced or professional at it—something not expected of idiots like those arrested. And It is not, alas, the first time something like this has happened in Yaroslav. In the mid-90s, when these current accused were far too young to have had a hand in it, two people discovered the body of a 12 y/o boy on a shop roof in the market district. The next day they were sitting near the same site, discussing the incident of the day before, when they witnessed a young girl fall to the same place from an upper rooftop. When the roof was examined, implements and etchings of ritualistic nature adorned the surface. No one was ever arrested for the deaths.Makovkin was extracted—literally dragged—from a local mental hospital at his arrest, where he had committed himself days after the murders. Doctors had allowed him to stay for observation, but had noted they believed his condition simulated. He informed the investigators as they took him into custody, "Сатана поможет ему уйти от ответственности. Я ведь принес ему много жертв." ("Satan will help me avoid culpability: I've brought him many sacrifices.") Another of the assailants, when asked why he'd done this, said "пытался обратиться к Богу, но это не принесло ему денег. Я помолился Сатане, и дела улучшились." ("I tried to turn to God, but that didn't give me any money. So I prayed to Satan, and things got better.") It was not made clear in the article, but one might assume the latter remark to have come from the leader, Ogolobyak, who is a former choirboy from the Petropavlovski cathedral.The expected backlash of this will be the targetting of the goth. culture: already a topic of discussion this year in Russian law, the sets the groundwork for implementing the proposed banning of all such things from stores, schools and most any public, and possibly private, place.Hopefully it doesn't spread into an all out ban on people dressed in black with long black hair—or there goes my plan to visit Russia!Seriously, though: WTF is wrong with these people?

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Sources:NewsRU.com: Sep 16, 2008 18:46.KP: part I, Sep 9, 2008, and part II, Sep 10, 2008.Listening to: Retribution Gospel Choir, s/t album, track 9, "Kids"... "Those damn kids, don't they understand you can't do shit like that?"

WSB

Apparently it is Burroughs' Day. This morning I was reading and came across Timothy Leary writing about a fictional "William Seward Burroughs Memorial High School"; now logging on here this evening, I see this lovely image:

with an equally lovely sentiment, and one all too suitable to the day. Sad to think the old chap's been gone nearly eleven years now. In memory, enjoy some "Words of Advice for Young People":

Now, some of you may encounter the Devil's Bargain, if you get that far. Any old soul is worth saving, at least to a priest, but not every soul is worth buying. So, you can take the offer as a compliment.

The Crave

Realizing it's been a while since I've posted anything here, and longer yet since I posted any music—the primary attraction of this blog, certainly—I thought I ought to rectify that. But I haven't been writing, or releasing, much lately—only so many hours in a day! (isn't that the saying?)—which presents a slight problem for the idea of posting new music.

One of the benefits of being barking mad, however, is that one's never lacking for sources of inspiration! Contemplating this very problem, for instance, I happened to look down and see the side of the box that housed the tiny travesty of a meal I'd just had, and observed what, I suppose, is their current marketing slogan, in the way of a question: "Have we satisfied The Crave? 1-800-THE-CRAVE". "mon Dieu! Absolutely not!" was my initial reaction—no, seriously, the French and all (it happens)—but then I had a thought (yes, unbelievably, that happens too [stop laughing!—no, really, John, stop laughing]) and realized maybe they had after all... though hardly with the victuals.

Rather, "The Crave" is one of the best known (and one of my personal favorite) piano works by ragtime / jazz pioneer Ferdinand Joseph Lamothe, better known as "Jelly Roll" Morton (1890-1941). I will include a recording of the man himself playing it below for comparison.

But what does that have to do with my dilemma? (Thanks for asking.) I decided to see if I could make a convincing string quintet out of "The Crave". I'll let you folks decide whether I was successful in the endeavor—but if I wasn't, it's no worry, as I still learned something: to wit, how surprisingly annoying it is to try to notate Jelly Roll's rhythmic phrasing in midi! This frustration is reflected in the string arrangement being a little less than half the length of the piano recording included here. It is still faithful to his composition, only I've worked from a more pared down version of the song than the one he's playing below (that version is the one recorded by Alan Lomax in 1938, and comes from disc 6 of Jelly Roll Morton, The Complete Library of Congress Recordings (Amazon: CD or MP3), track 12 [out of 128 total for the set]; in it, he plays a more elaborate version of the piece, with variations).

Enjoy!—and feel free to dance if that tango spirit gets to you. (That's a first I think—I'm pretty sure I could never before be accused of writing dance music.)